Heylo! I am Smayocat, Guildmistress of Dead Flat Chest. You may remember us from last campaign when we were aiming for Vanarch of Poporia! We managed to stay in 6th place for a decent amount of time! What have we done in the meantime?

We spent a lot of time hunting down transgressors who have made your experiences horrible too! (Please look at the picture below)



With that out of the way, you may be wondering "Dead Flat Who?!" or "Wait, not everyone in the guild is flat chested... I saw High Elves and Castanics in there!"

To answer the latter, do not worry, they were originally flat as boards but with the help of the finest plastic surgeon in South Shara, they managed to hide that fact. They are indeed genuine flatties!

For the first question, we started as two friends who looked at the guilds on the server during open beta noticing that most guilds have serious business names. Since we were two elins we decided to create a safe haven for the ladies (and some males) who feel the need to group with people who share their flat chested-ness with other flatties. And lo, the guild was born! We are a small guild with people who make the game six kinds of fun! (We refuse to go five or seven because they are prime numbers)

So the big question is, why should you vote for us? What does Dead Flat Chest do besides putting heads of transgressors on pikes?
-We'll do our best to provide services open in the area (trainers, trade brokers, specialty shops)
-Take away racial profiling in the area, no matter if you're Baraka or Castanic.
-We won't segregate flatties from no flatties. Whether you have things on your chest or not, we don't hate!
-We'll have small events with fun filled monetary prizes. Such as "Where's Smayocat?", "Kick the Kan", and "Is this an Elin chest or a man chest?"
-Taxes will be kept low!
-Relatively free healthcare, Canada style!

Look at these fine people voting for Smayocat!



Although her sign says not voting, you know she is going to vote for us! We put the awesome inside awesome sauce!

So what are you waiting for? Vote Smayocat! Vote for flatties everywhere!

*secretly getting ready to skewer the last dolls head on a spike*
But really we are nice people. >_>

They still accepted me after going through several plastic surgeries. I was once a confused little elin not so proud of my flat chestedness. Feeling the need to have two plumps of watery goodness known as tera boob physics on my chest I ended up making a new main that was a castanic. They helped me get through those tough times and eventually feel proud of myself. I even came to terms and went through another surgery to once again be loud and proud of the flatness!

Those dolls are terrifying. How do you sleep at night?

Sleep...? What is that?

wait wtf those are dolls? I thought those were kids first scroll trough...

*Edit:* holy [filtered]....... am I really that old that I need glasses?

haha marionette, touche. insomniac high five!

I won't give you a high five, but instead I'll give you a high six!

right, prime numbers... but i don't have six fingers... *cuts off co-worker's finger and tapes it to hand*

BOOM HIGH SIX!

Actually you just use your other hand... ya know... like hold up your index finger with the other five fingers on the opposite hand....?

Can't get enough swing that way, i prefer my way.